Top 5 Least Likely Rumours for the iPhone 5
It seems that when people want something bad enough, or just have an active enough imagination, they really will believe anything. A case in point is the myriad of rumours and downright conjecture that surrounds the release of every iPhone, with everything from the plausible to the technologically impossible doing the rounds on the web. Some of the claims regarding the iPhone 5 are credible; others are outlandish. Here’s a few of the more fanciful ones we’ve heard:
iPhone 5 to feature a curved glass screen: This rumour has been swirling about cyberspace for months, teasing Apple fans with tales of everything from a slight curve in the screen to a full contact lens style glass mound. These rumours have surfaced many times before, but with the increased fragility and huge manufacturing costs it doesn’t look like this idea will make it beyond the drawing board any time soon. And besides, what’s wrong with the flat screen that’s currently on the iPhone? Looks pretty good to us.
The iPhone 5 will be teardrop shaped: Although Steve Jobs can be credited with bringing a failing company back from the brink of financial extinction, there was little to no chance in him convincing Apple that teardrops were the way to go. Nevertheless, emos rejoiced when it was ‘revealed’ earlier this year that the new iPhone 5 would also be available as a quaint teardrop model. Of course this addition would go beyond the minor changes made to each new model of iPhone and would barge into ‘ridiculous’ territory. Nevertheless, internet forums lit up with the ‘news’ and many began repeating it as fact, because, you know, online citizen journalism is totally reliable like that. The design currently in use with the 4 and 4S dates back to 2005, if recent prototype leaks are to be believed. If it has been good for Apple for the past 7 years there is no reason to suspect that they will drop the design anytime soon in favour of a teardrop.
The iPhone 5 will have no home button: This is an old rumour, but one that has persisted in recent months. The claim is that the iPhone will move towards an all-touchscreen design with no need for a physical home button; the button’s functionality can be moved entirely to onscreen features. The removal of the home button would allow Apple to increase the screen size of the iPhone 5 without increasing the overall size of the phone, which is currently well designed to fit into most people’s hands. All the evidence points against this rumour, as leaked images of components all show the home button right where it should be. The home button does not just serve a function either, it is an iconic part of the iPhone design that will most likely never be removed from future designs.
The iPhone 5 will have a QWERTY keyboard attached: Despite the fact that the iPhone surpassed the days of clunky keyboards sometime in 2008, leaving its key-wielding competitors like Nokia and its N series phones in the dust, rumours have abounded that the new iPhone will feature not only a touchscreen but also a slide out keyboard. Presumably this is for when you are too drunk to trust yourself typing on a touchscreen, and need a good old-fashioned keyboard on which your kebab-coated fingers can sext everyone in your phone book. Let’s be straight here: to revert to using a keyboard on the iPhone – even if it was in conjunction with a touchscreen – would be like making the next MacBook Pro out of wood: nice, but a tad too retro for our tastes.
The new iPhone will be fireproof: Now, we all know that feeling when you drop your phone, sometimes it lands safely on the ground with just a few scratches; sometimes (usually) it lands in water and never works again. Both these situations seem to be common experiences, and so a waterproof and much more durable version of the iPhone would certainly be welcomed by the public. However rumours are circulating that Apple have identified a problem which everyone can relate to: dropping your phone into a raging furnace. Just think – if your phone were just a few degrees more fireproof, you could plunge your hand into those flames and recover your toasty gadget. We’re not sure if this is supposed to be some kind of Ray Mears limited edition iPhone, or whether iPhones around the world have been spontaneously combusting, but we do know that a fireproof iPhone would be about as much use as, well, a fireproof iPhone. Let’s try and make iPhones that can survive the basic stuff first – like being dropped from a height of five inches – and we can worry about imbuing them with flame-retardant properties later.
There’s lots of things we’re looking forward to witnessing with the iPhone 5, but these five definitely aren’t on our list.
